Okay, Moms. We all know the day is coming when our babies have to leave home either to go to college or get their own place. We all did it at some point, and now our children must do it as well. I just went through this a few months ago with my son who is 21, and I thought the world was coming to an end. I was literally heartbroken, but after a while things got better. I calmed down and went back to my normal routine. When this happens to you, or maybe it has already happened to you, you can get through this transition very smoothly with some tips I am about to give you. I am not perfect by any means and have made my share of mistakes along the way, but I thought I could shed some light on this topic and share what I went through.
Here are 10 survival tips you can use when your adult kids leave home:
1. Don’t panic. I know it’s hard to calm down, but trust me, don’t lose it right now. Things will get better!
2. Help your child with things they need to do such as packing, moving, getting things set up in their new homes, etc. Doing these practical and necessary things can give your mind and emotions a break.
3. Do not be negative about them leaving if they are getting their own place. This will discourage them from trying to be independent at all. You don’t want them to think that you don’t support them.
4. Let them know that they are always welcome to come back to your home if things don’t work out and that you will always be there for them whenever they need you, because they will still need you for a while. Trust me.
5. After they first leave, there will be a period of time when they really won’t talk to you a whole lot. Don’t freak out. This will pass. Keep the communication going as best you can and remember to give them their space. My son and I are still very close and see and talk to each other often. Not as much as when he lived with me, but now we have a different kind of relationship.
6. Expect mistakes. On your part and theirs. We are not perfect, so making mistakes along the way is perfectly normal. We just have to learn from them and try not to make the same ones again.
7. Remember that this difficult transition won’t last forever, and there is always light at the end of the tunnel. You will get through this!
8. It’s perfectly okay to help them when they need you. Let them know that you are always there for them. It’s okay to let them borrow money from you if they need to or swing over for a free meal. Remember, you probably needed financial help from your parents at one time in your life. We all did.
9. If things go wrong and you’re left feeling sad and hurt, then just pray…a lot! God will help you get through this transition in your life.
10. Above all else, have faith!
Written by Cheryl Romans
Cheryl is a very fun loving, easy-going kind of girl with a passion for God, family, animals and writing. Her three beagles are considered her “fur babies”. Life might get a little crazy for her at times because she juggles a full time job with finishing up her degree in journalism while trying to take care of her house. When she does have spare time, she loves to read, write, spend time with her husband and family, and just relax at home.